OBLIGATIONS AS CAREGIVERS HAVE PUT STRAIN ON MARRIAGE


OBLIGATIONS AS CAREGIVERS HAVE PUT STRAIN ON MARRIAGE

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have been taking care of my father-in-law for four years -- getting his groceries, going to the bank, picking up prescriptions and doing different tasks. He's disabled and lives in an upstairs apartment with no access to getting downstairs. He can't walk, bathe himself or get in and out of bed by himself. He has hired a nurse to get him in and out of bed every day. Because we live 30 minutes away and we both work, there is no way we can manage this.

My father passed away recently, so I've also been helping my mom. All of this has put a strain on our marriage -- I'm going one way, and my husband is going the other, plus my father-in-law has complained that I'm not coming over. I have tried explaining to him that I can't be in two places at once.

kAm~FC adE9 H655:?8 2??:G6CD2CJ :D 4@>:?8 FA[ 2?5 H6 92G6 E@=5 3@E9 @7 @FC A2C6?ED H6 H@?'E 36 4@>:?8 @G6C E92E H66<6?5 2?5 H:== 36 4FEE:?8 324< E@ 6G6CJ @E96C H66<6?5 D@ H6 42? DA6?5 E:>6 E@86E96C] %@ @FC 5:D>2J[ H6 8@E AFD9324<[ H:E9 4@>>6?ED =:<6[ "(6==[ J@F D66 6249 @E96C 6G6CJ ?:89E]" (6 EC:65 E@ 6IA=2:? E92E 3J E96 E:>6 H6 86E 9@>6[ 62E 2?5 5@ E96 5:D96D[ E96C6 :D?'E >F49 E@86E96C E:>6[ 2?5 567:?:E6=J ?@E 6?@F89 7@C 2 52J 2E E96 A2C< @C D@>6E9:?8]k^Am kAms@ J@F 92G6 25G:46 @? 9@H E@ 92?5=6 E9:Dn (6 H2?E E@ 4@?E:?F6 E@ 96=A 3FE H6 ?665 @FC E:>6 E@@[ D@ H6 E9@F89E H6 925 DF886DE65 2 8@@5 4@>AC@>:D6]k^AmkAmkDEC@?8mq&#}ts ~&% x} (x$r~}$x}k^DEC@?8mk^AmkAmkDEC@?8mstp# q&#}ts ~&%ik^DEC@?8m xD E96C6 2?J@?6 6=D6 H9@ 4@F=5 36 96=A7F= E@ J@FC 72E96C\:?\=2H[ H9@ ?@H D66>D :D@=2E65 7C@> 6G6CJ@?6 3FE J@F 2?5 9:D D@?n pC6 E96C6 2?J C6=2E:G6D @C 7C:6?5D @7 9:D 2?5 9:D =2E6 H:76 H9@ 4@F=5 G:D:E 9:>n x7 E96 2?DH6C :D ?@[ D@>6@?6 7C@> J@FC C6=:8:@FD 4@>>F?:EJ @C J@FC =@42= 2C62 286?4J @? 28:?8 >:89E 36 23=6 E@ 96=A]k^Am kAm*@F 2?5 J@FC 9FD32?5 2AA62C E@ 36 =@G:?8 2?5 86?6C@FD A6@A=6[ 3FE J@F >FDE AFE E96 962=E9 @7 J@FC >2CC:286 9:896C @? J@FC =:DE @7 AC:@C:E:6D 2?5 ?@E A6C>:E J@FCD6=G6D E@ 36 8F:=E65 @FE @7 :E]k^AmkAmkDEC@?8mstp# pqq*ik^DEC@?8m p 4=@D6 7C:6?5[ H9@ x 2=D@ H@C< H:E9[ 28C665 E@ 2EE6?5 2 A2=6@?E@=@8J 6I9:3:E H:E9 >6 2AAC@I:>2E6=J D:I >@?E9D 367@C6 E96 6I9:3:E H2D D4965F=65 E@ @A6?] (6 H6C6 3@E9 6I4:E65 23@FE :E 2?5 E2=<65 7C6BF6?E=J 23@FE 9@H >F49 7F? :E H@F=5 36 E@ 2EE6?5 E@86E96C]k^AmkAmp3@FE 2 H66< 27E6C :E @A6?65[ x H2D F?6IA64E65=J @FE @7 E96 @77:46 7@C 2 >65:42= 6>6C86?4J[ 2?5 >J 7C:6?5 2EE6?565 E96 6I9:3:E H:E9@FE >6] p> x HC@?8 7@C 766=:?8 FAD6En $96 <66AD E6==:?8 >6 E@ 86E @G6C :E 2?5 :D ?@E 36:?8 F?56CDE2?5:?8 2E 2==] p> x @G6CC624E:?8nk^AmkAmkDEC@?8mq~%wt#ts x} %wt tp$%k^DEC@?8mk^AmkAmkDEC@?8mstp# q~%wt#tsik^DEC@?8m x7 E96 6I9:3:E H2D 7:?:D965 367@C6 J@F H6C6 23=6 E@ 8@[ J@F D9@F=5?'E 3=2>6 J@FC 7C:6?5 7@C D66:?8 :E] x7[ 9@H6G6C[ E96 6I9:3:E H2D DE:== @?[ x 42?'E 3=2>6 J@F 7@C 36:?8 FAD6E E92E D96 H6?E H:E9@FE J@F] %96 BF6DE:@? ?@H :D[ :D E9:D H@CE9 6?5:?8 2 7C:6?5D9:A @G6Cn Wx 9@A6 ?@E]Xk^AmkAms62C p33J :D HC:EE6? 3J p3:82:= '2? qFC6?[ 2=D@ <?@H? 2D y62??6 !9:==:AD[ 2?5 H2D 7@F?565 3J 96C >@E96C[ !2F=:?6 !9:==:AD] r@?E24E s62C p33J 2E k2 9C67lQ9EEAi^^HHH]s62Cp33J]4@>QmHHH]s62Cp33J]4@>k^2m @C !]~] q@I ehcc_[ {@D p?86=6D[ rp h__eh]k^Am

Previous articleNext article

POPULAR CATEGORY

corporate

12813

tech

11464

entertainment

15995

research

7394

misc

16829

wellness

12912

athletics

16929